Halloween has turned into the holiday where people shamelessly objectify women, and I feel that the only fair thing to do is to start objectifying men, too.

For your viewing pleasure, men being objectified:

I felt really good about that. Let’s move on.

I think the whole women in over-the-top sexy costumes thing is a little played out- it’s taken all the creativity out of figuring out what you’re going to be and making a costume.

But I don’t think I’ll be able to change that trend, so I propose a new, probably way better solution than wearing something more tame.

Shamelessly revealing costumes for men is something the public has not seen enough of so, I’d like to see men from all ages and walks of life going to Halloween pop-up stores and having sexy cop, firefighter, hula dancer, etc. be their only costume options. I want men, no matter tone or pudgy, to feel pressured into wearing a sexy costume. And none of these men can be gay. You get no credit for sexy costumes. If you are a straight man out there, strutting your stuff in some low-quality lycra, I salute you. In my slutty military outfit.

Let’s make slutty Halloween costumes an equal opportunity exploiter. I want to see this for Halloween: